I spent the weekend doing last minute shopping and packing up for our trip. It's causing me some wicked anxiety.
I made a list of what I need to buy.
I made lists of what to pack, broken down by each family member. And a list of toiletries that will need to be packed. I have set the toiletries out on the counter, they are categorized by their type (first aid, medication, etc.).
I'm not really sure how I ended up this anal about packing. I'm going to blame it on having kids because I used to be the morning we were leaving packer. Now I'm starting DAYS before we leave. It's a little insane. Maybe I need help or medication, I sure could use some anxiety medication right now. I feel it in my stomach, the anxiety build up. It's mixed in with some excitement and fear. The fear I'll be vomited on. Again.
And as my friend Kelly reminds me often, we are NOT going to a third world country and I can buy stuff I forget there. Yes I know this, but I also have been on enough trips with Leo who always comments when I say "We need to get this or that" with "Don't we have that at home? Why didn't you pack it?". And yes we can do laundry but I don't want to have to keep up with my clothing count every night to make sure we all have fresh underwear for the morning. And then have to do a load of laundry at 2 AM to make sure someones not wearing yesterdays underwear inside out in an attempt to feel "fresh". I'm trying to avoid the stress by getting it out of the way BEFORE we're there...
At least that's what I'm telling myself!
the paradox of perspective
1 month ago